Who Am I as a Communicator?

On this week we were to assess ourselves as well as have two other people to assess us to see how we are as a communicator. The measures of evaluation were Communication Anxiety Inventory, and Verbal Aggressiveness Scale (Rubin, Palmgreen, & Sypher, 2009). What amazes me is that after I looked at the communication anxiety assessment we all gave me a different category. I find that it is very hard for me to speak in front of small or large groups of people. I begin to panic, my palms seat bad, my head feels like it is about to explode and feel hot, my ears start ringing, and my heart starts to beat fast. I do not know why I cannot speak in front of people when the funny thing is I took a public speaking class. The two people that assessed me as well felt that I communicate okay around others and that they could not tell that I was nervous or anything. One thing about me is when I am nervous I tend to joke around a lot and laugh to keep myself from panicking or crying. I was never one to have high self-esteem because I always downed myself and never thought that I was good enough to do anything. Even now when I cannot speak in front of people I feel that I am less than others. O’Hair, Wiemann, Mullin, and Teven (2015) states that “some people have low self-esteem, or a poor view of themselves, because they lack accurate information about themselves or they mistrust the knowledge they do possess” (p. 48). A similarity that I found was that my co-worker and I had the same score for the verbal aggressiveness.  If I get in an argument with a person, I do not attack their character or them, but I do attack the problem at hand and let my point be heard. My friend rated me as a significant because she let he previous schema about me from our elementary and middle school years cloud her judgment as to who I am today as a mother and an early childhood educator. Who I was then is definitely not who I am now.

My results from both assessments from myself and two others are as follow:

Communication Anxietypublic-speaking4

How I See Myself

Score: 60 Elevated

The range of scores indicates that you feel uncomfortable in several communication contexts. You may want to look back through the test and determine which one are most anxious for you.

T. Felton (Co-Worker)

Score: 49 Moderate

You score indicates that you feel somewhat concerned about a number of communication contexts, but probably not all. This mid-point level of communication anxiety is what we call, “situational”.

 

L. Thomas (Friend)

Score: 46 Mild

You report that you feel a bit uneasy in some communication situations and somewhat more confident in other contexts. Communication does not seem to be something you worry a great deal about.

tumblr_n9tmssUeBA1tfm82so1_250

Verbal Aggressiveness

verbal

Myself

Score: 63 Moderate

You maintain a good balance between respect and consideration for others’ viewpoints and the ability to argue fairly by attacking the facts of a position rather than the person holding the position.

 

T. Felton

Score: 63 Moderate

You maintain a good balance between respect and consideration for others’ viewpoints and the ability to argue fairly by attacking the facts of a position rather than the person holding the position.

 

L. Thomas

Score: 73 Significant

With little provocation, you might cross the line from” argumentativeness”, which attacks a person’s position or statements, and verbal aggression, which involves personal attacks and can be hurtful to the listener.

verbal 2

The two insights that I would like to share with you this week are:

  1. Asserting Edwards (1990), “Your self-concept powerfully shapes your communication with others. It can affect what you think of other people, because your perception of others is related to how you think of yourself” (as cited in O’Hair et al., 2015, p.47).

 

  1. No matter where you are at in your life, know that it is okay to be you and to be who you are. Stay true to yourself and if people cannot accept you for who you are, then maybe they were not meant to be in your life. Do not go around trying to compare yourself to others because in the end it may cause you unhappiness.

be-yourself

References

Rubin, R. B., Palmgreen, P., & Sypher, H. E. (Eds.) (2009). Communication research measures: A sourcebook. “Communication Anxiety Inventory” New York: Routledge.

Rubin, R. B., Palmgreen, P., & Sypher, H. E. (Eds.) (2009). Communication research measures: A sourcebook. “Verbal Aggressiveness Scale” New York: Routledge.

O’Hair, D., Wiemann, M., Mullin, D. I., & Teven, J.  (2015). Real communication (3rd. ed). New York: Bedford/St. Martin’s.

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9 thoughts on “Who Am I as a Communicator?

  1. Dionna,
    I love how detailed your blog is. Great post! It appears a few of us commonly fear public speaking however do better than we think as others assess us as having less anxiety than we assume to. It is so very interesting to see that others see us differently than we see ourselves and usually better than we perceive ourselves to be. Growing up we were always told to be on our best behavior when we go out, and my sisters and I regardless of how much we acted up at home were always prim and proper outside. I guess I carried this into my adult life and in communication. It is all about the context and situation. No matter how much I feel on the inside that my communication skills aren’t good enough, when communicating in public it is just right.
    I love your 2nd insight, reminds me of my favorite Dr. Seuss quote: ” Today you are you, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is yourer than you.”

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  2. Great post!!!! Your shared quote is so true; real friends love you for who you are and not for who they want you to be.

    Like

  3. Dionna,
    I am just like you when I have to speak in front of a large group. I try so hard every time I have to speak not to get that way but it never works and I end up all sweaty before I am done. The difference between you and me is that I have a high self-esteem and I have always been that way, but one thing that I have learned along the way is that you have the ability to change who you are and I think that you have; you just have not given yourself the credit. From your blogs it seems like you are a very intelligent person so you just have to believe in yourself. Great post I love the visuals.

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    • Thank you so much Juanita. I am learning everyday to believe in myself. It has been a struggle because I have been through so much in my life and yes my self-esteem has been at is lowest and now I am trying to build it back up. It has not been easy but I am making it.

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  4. Dionna,
    Such a detailed post, I loved reading it!!!! I loved your shared quote, because it speaks to so many things! Never change who you are, because you will put out good vibes, and great people will come to you!

    Like

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